What if my 17 year old self knew

I’m looking around my apartment searching for some kind of inspiration. I can’t find one. I feel drained, I feel discouraged. Is this what journalism is about?

No. It really isn’t. I can only blame myself for the late nights I have preparing homework. Part of me enjoys it.

I think back to grade 12 – five years ago, perhaps to the day – I was anxiously putting together a portfolio for this program. I was likely up into the same hours of the night trying to put together this piece that I never attempted before. Did I have much of a portfolio? Probably not, but I felt encouraged by my English teacher to continue with the application. Both her and I knew I could get to where I am today.

Well, today, I’m sitting here, sipping on coffee. Keeping my eyes open as I slowly but surely remove things from the list that sits beside me. This has become a Monday night/Tuesday morning tradition.

If I knew this would be me five years ago, would I have been so excited to apply for CreComm? To be perfectly honest, if I had a student tell me five years ago when I was in high school what the program was about. I would have ran away with my tail tucked between my legs.

I never dreamed the profession of journalism would inhale my life like this. I know I’m technically still a student, but thanks to RRC I believe I can consider myself a professional who is ready to work in the industry whenever I am called upon.

Social media, web edits, Projector, IPP, classes, homework, radio programs and dealing with issues in my personal life have left me drained this semester. I’m not ashamed to admit that.

If you read my blog post last week, you might recall reading my former editor’s column about living and breathing the job of an editor.

I think we all feel that. We all lay down for bed and wonder if we phrased that particular sentence in our story well enough or what is due tomorrow.

My 17 year old self wasn’t prepared for that. My 22 year old self is just squeaking by.

But I love it. I love what I do and I would never change it. I look at the news with a brand new passion. I find the stories more compelling and I’m able to give more constructive criticism about what I thought about stories. I’ve learned about things that I always dreamed about learning.

Nothing gives me more of a thrill than being behind the microphone, in front of the camera or seeing my name printed in ink. I’m a news junkie. Those are the moments I live for. I love having my voice heard, my story told, and I love knowing that I have the ability to impact society for the better through my words.

Now, if my 17 year old self knew that, he would have thought it was pretty cool.

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